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Transition to daycare (Kita-Eingewöhnung)

  • Writer: Johanna
    Johanna
  • Aug 2
  • 7 min read

When your child starts daycare, many changes occur. It's a major developmental milestone. Emotionally, socially, and cognitively. The more supportive this transition is handled, the more secure and resilient your child will become.



Kindergarten familiarization
© Mylittlesprout

Why transitioning to daycare (Kita-Eingewöhnung) is more than just organising


Transitions to new care settings are considered "life transitions," or profound changes in a child's life. According to Bronfenbrenner's ecosystemic approach, these transitions affect not only the child but also their relationships and their entire living environment.


A well-prepared settling-in period allows for designing this transition as a continuous bonding experience, not as an abrupt separation. From a scientific perspective, entry into daycare is considered a "transition event" with long-term effects on emotional security, stress regulation, and educational development.


Starting daycare or nursery also means saying goodbye to a familiar every day while opening the door to new experiences, friendships, and development opportunities.


Children sense when they don't have to go through this transition alone. If you provide your child with security, give them time to adjust, and lovingly support their feelings, this new phase of life can become a strengthening experience.


A gentle start doesn't begin on the first day, but happens weeks before, with short conversations about the new place, looking at photos, or even taking a walk to the facility. This way gradually builds, and your child can embark on their new adventure with curiosity and courage.



Attachment in toddlers – the emotional foundation for development


Attachment is the invisible bond that connects a child to their caregivers. It doesn't develop overnight, but rather through countless small moments: when you respond to your child's crying, comfort them, laugh, play with them, or simply be there. Attachment develops to its full potential, especially during infancy, roughly between the first and third years of life. During this phase, children are particularly sensitive to closeness, reliability, and emotional resonance.


They increasingly explore their environment, but always return to their secure base. This secure base helps children navigate the world, overcome challenges, and develop emotional security.


Studies show: That Children with secure attachment exhibit higher self-confidence, greater social competence, easier learning, and better stress regulation. Bonding is therefore not just a matter of feelings; it is a central factor of protection and development.


At the same time, it's essential to remember that attachment is not a fixed concept. It develops in everyday life, can become more established, but can also be altered or strengthened, especially through sensitive support during transitional phases.


If your child cries when saying goodbye or clings to you, they are showing attachment. Their behavior is saying, "You are my secure base."



Sensitivity as a protective factor


Sensitivity means perceiving the child's signals, interpreting them correctly, and responding promptly and appropriately. This parental attitude is especially crucial during transitional phases.


Studies show: Many children whose parents react sensitively exhibit less Separation anxiety and open up more quickly to the new environment. Educational professionals can also provide loving, sensitive support, becoming the new secure base and thus strengthening the emotional stability of the child.


It's important to note: Children with strong family ties can have difficulty with separation. Precisely because they have established a secure attachment, they experience the farewell particularly intensely, and this can trigger separation pain on both sides. This is not a sign of weakness, but of the depth of the relationship.



Attachment and brain development – why security is so central


During the first early years of life, central brain structures responsible for stress regulation, impulse control, and social cognition develop. Early childhood bonding experiences act as a buffer against excessive demands. A gentle, gradual introduction protects the child's nervous system.


Studies show: When children feel safe and secure with their parents or caregivers, they can concentrate better, manage anger or frustration better, and learn more successfully in the long term.



Every child is different – and that’s a good thing


No two children are alike. Some explore their new surroundings confidently and with great curiosity. Others need intensive support. This isn't due to "right" or "wrong," but rather to individual temperament, previous relationship experiences, developmental stages, and the way children deal with new situations.


Research shows: Children have very different needs. Some are lively, sociable children with a strong desire to explore, while others are sensitive children who, when faced with new situations, first need to observe and process them for a long time. The ability to self-regulate varies among them.


During periods of intense separation pain, it is especially important that parents and professionals work together as a team . If everyone involved communicates openly, pays attention to signals, and engages in regular conversation, a great deal of security can be created, even if the adjustment period takes longer or is challenging.


An honest exchange about questions such as:

  • How is my child currently experiencing the settling-in period?

  • What is good for it, what is too much for it?

  • Which rituals help?

  • How do we as parents feel about the separation?

…enables individual solutions that truly suit the child.


Settling is a shared process, supported by patience, trust and an open heart.



The child in the center: a comparison of two proven familiarization models


Many institutions operate according to two proven concepts: the Berlin Model and the Munich Model. Both are based on attachment theory and aim to provide children with a secure start.



Berlin model

The Berlin model is an effective method for gently helping children in transitioning to daycare (nursery), taking into account the individual needs of the child and following a structured process:


  • Preparation phase: Parents are informed about the process in a preliminary meeting.

  • Basic phase: Parents accompany the child during the first few days, but remain in the background.

  • First separation: From about the fourth day onwards, a brief separation attempt is made.

  • Stabilization phase: The educational professional takes on increasing responsibility.

  • Final phase: The child remains increasingly independent in the facility.


This model provides orientation and security.


Studies show that a sensitively conducted familiarization process leads to a measurable reduction in stress hormones.



Munich model

The Munich model focuses on the child's active role.


  • Preparation: preliminary discussion, individual daycare schedule if necessary.

  • Settling in: Parents and child participate together in group activities.

  • Safety phase: The professional takes over initial tasks, and parents slowly withdraw.

  • Trust phase: The first short separations occur as soon as the child actively contacts the professional.

  • Reflection phase: Joint final discussion.


This approach is particularly suitable for sensitive and observant children.


Studies show that active participation increases the feeling of self-efficacy and emotional security.



Similarities and differences

Both models aim to build a strong bond between child and professional, to stabilize the child emotionally, and to support the child as they grow into the group. The Berlin model offers a clearly structured orientation, while the Munich model responds even more closely to the child's individual cues and pace. What matters is not which model is chosen, but how lovingly and needs-oriented it is implemented.



Empowering parents – an often overlooked part of the settling-in process


Settling in doesn't just affect children; parents also go through profound change. It's completely normal for parents to feel sad, uncertain, or ambivalent . You might feel a lump in your throat when you leave your child crying. Or you might doubt whether this is really the right time.

All of this is allowed.


Separation pain isn't a sign of weakness, but an expression of attachment. When you acknowledge your feelings and take good care of yourself, you remain internally stable, and this gives your child support.


Small breaks like a walk, a phone call with a friend or a moment of peace can help you stay balanced.


Sometimes a change of perspective helps: Perhaps the separation will be easier for your child with another caregiver, such as the other parent or a close caregiver. This isn't a failure, but a loving solution!



Conclusion: Settling in is relationship work – not a test


The Transition to daycare (Kita-Eingewöhnung) isn't a test, neither for you nor your child. When your child experiences: "I am seen. I'm allowed to be sad. I'm safe," a strong foundation is created – for social relationships, for learning, for life.


You remain their safe haven, even when your child takes their first brave steps into a new world!







Status: 08/2025

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